Forgiving Yourself

Summary: Forgiving Yourself

  • We become imprisoned in the past when we do not forgive ourselves for past mistakes. 

  • If you have not sought forgiveness from your victim, do so. Forgiving yourself will be easier after you have sought forgiveness from your victim. 

  • We do not heal in isolation. Connecting with others is how we develop compassion for others and for ourselves.

Stone Ritual: The Hand of Mercy

  1. Find a small stone that fits in the palm of your hand.

  2. Hold it in your left hand. This is the hand of judgment.

  3. For each item on your list of things you need to forgive yourself for, transfer the stone from your left hand to your right hand.

  4. The right hand is the hand of mercy and forgiveness.

  5. Holding the stone in your right hand, say the words “I forgive myself for . . .” and fill in an item from your list.

  6. When you are done, return the stone to where you found it.

Journal Exercise

  1. Make a list of all the things for which you need to forgive yourself.

  2. For each thing you have listed, decide whether the forgiveness you need is from someone else or yourself. If it is from someone else, then walk the Fourfold Path. If it is truly from yourself, then it is time to rediscover your goodness.

  3. Write a list of all that is good about you. Look at yourself through the eyes of a loving and admiring companion.

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As we continue in our book study, we encourage you to purchase Desmond and Mpho Tutu's The Book of Forgiving which is available as a hard copy, audiobook, and ebook. All of the above comes directly from the end of each chapter. If your finances are preventing you from purchasing the book, please reach out to Pastor Sarah.

Tutu, Mpho, and Tutu, Desmond. The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World. United States, HarperCollins, 2014.